Saturday, July 22, 2017

New Jersey-Its Own Worst Enemy

    Governor Chris Christie, he of the penchant for doughnuts and a "Screw You" attitude, signed a bill this week which raises the minimum age to buy tobacco products to twenty-one.

    Now, I have never smoked and will never smoke (I may take up
I should smoke, though.
 I could be quite a hit with the ladies.
crack when I turn 80.  If I make it that long.).  My apologies to those who enjoy "lighting up a fag", but I think smoking is a disgusting habit.  My own mother (as opposed to someone else's) passed away thirty-four years ago of lung cancer.  She had smoked like a tire fire ever since she was a teenager. Connect the dots.


    My point is that I am not a crusader for smoking.

    But, come on, this is the dumbest thing to come down the pike since the mayor of Philadelphia decided to put a tax on sodas and other sugary drinks.  New Jersey is the third such state to implement this ridiculous law, the others being Hawaii and California (to which I hear, "Well, that figures.").

"Whaddya mean, you wanna see ID?"
  To deny young people who can vote and fight in our nation's wars (which are far too frequent) the idiotic choice to smoke is...well...idiotic.  I hasten to say, "back in my day," but "back in my day," when you were 18, you were considered an adult in every sense of the word (drinking age was 18 then.  In essence, my generation effed it up for generations to follow.  My bad).  

    Now?  

    Not only can they not have an alcoholic beverage (which I also find ludicrous), they won't be able to smoke in New Jersey.  Or at least buy the stuff.  "The Garden State" just can't seem to help itself as being the laughingstock of the country.  At least in Hawaii and California you have pineapples and Disneyland.  What does New Jersey have?  Camden and the turnpike.  

    So, when a young person turns 18, we say to them, "Congratulations!  Now you're an adult.  Sorta.  Not really."

   They also can't rent cars or go to casinos, either.   But, they can be drafted (yes, they can) and can...vote.  What's the fun in those two things?

    People younger than 21 will continue to smoke.  I didn't read the
"Don't sweat it, boys.
Tubby's gonna make us a lot of dough.
Okay, here's what I want youse ta do.
Take this truck and park outside community colleges,
Fort Dix, and skateboard parks.
We're gonna be frikkin' millionaires."
entire law to see if it would be illegal to light up in their own homes or whether the restriction is just buying the nasty stuff.  But, regardless, cigarettes and smokeless tobacco will go on being used by the chronologically gray period of quasi-adulthood, 18-21.


    

    Similar to Prohibition, I predict a  black market of sorts for these things as recent high school graduates start "jonesin'" for a nicotine fix.
"That's 'Market of Color'."

New Jersey-Proving There's Always Room For Another Punchline.     
"Curious.  Do cookies come with that punch?"

20 comments:

  1. I'm surprised. It will cut into their cigarette tax revenue. Indiana would never dream of doing THAT.

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    1. Exactly what I thought. Cigarettes are crazy frikkin' expensive. Amazed they're okay with losing that tax revenue. Hawaii and California at least have tourism dollars. New Jersey? That makes me laugh.

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  2. Since my dad died of lung cancer, anything that hurts smokers' favorite hobby and the companies that make fortunes off of them pleases me beyond delight

    but raising the age is rather dumb

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  3. Only have to be 19 to do everything up here. Smoking is a nasty habit, disgusting and expensive, I'd be all for watching the cigarette companies catch fire, but raising the age? Umm yeah, okay.

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    1. You, Adam, and I share the same logic. 19? You mean Canada trusts its citizens? Good for you.

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  4. I have mixed feelings about this. I believe in personal freedom but cigarettes kill people and they die slowly at a major expense to taxpayers. I don't think these laws will help all that much but I applaud the effort to do something.

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    1. My belief in personal freedom trumps (no pun intended) my revulsion at a disgusting habit which played a role in killing my mother.
      There should be a warning that costs associated with any "smoking related" illness should be borne by the idiot who partakes in it.
      I have the same belief about motorcycle helmet laws.

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  5. Christie is probably the biggest (figuratively and literally) joke on the Eastern Seaboard. I remember he almost showed some class when Obama helped out New Jersey after the hurricane, but that was as close as he ever came. What is the matter with people in that state that they would elect such a pompous ass?

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    1. He's term-limited so that won't be a factor. But, if he wasn't, no way he gets reelected.

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  6. I have tried to read this post three times and each time I get interrupted and so I have given up and just ganna say I was here

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  7. Um, okay... Whatever the legal age is, those who want to do it will find a way.

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  8. I suppose the greatest question I have about Chris Christie is "how the fuck does he keep getting re-elected?" American youth have it so strange. Like you said, you can go to war at 18 but that's it. You're an adult, but you can't do anything that makes you an adult.

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    1. Christie is the biggest laughingstock in the country (and the reason he's been seen quite often in Captain Caption).
      You haven't been able to follow a lot of his misadventures. He's trying to be a sports radio talk show host in New York. Yeah, no kidding.

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  9. "Well, guess I won't be able to smoke for the next 3 years. What a bummer." - no 18 year old, ever

    Now instead of asking an older adult to buy booze, we'll also have older adults buying cigarettes for kids. I see no real change here.

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    1. And older adults will. Because those older adults will think it's ridiculous.

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  10. Laws won't stop young people from drinking and smoking.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. True that. Or crossing over into Pennsylvania, New York, or Delaware.

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