NOTE: The following isn't so much a 'repost' as a 'revisit.'
On the Friday of Presidents Day Weekend in 2012, my sister's son graduated from Navy boot camp just north of Chicago. To celebrate, several family members made the trip from the East Coast to the Windy City. For my non-American friends (you lucky bastards), that's the nickname given to the city of Chicago. Which you can find in the Midwest. Or roughly where all the gunfire is.
The intelligent members of the family flew. The knuckleheads-my brother, nephew, and I-drove. This trip was outlined in excruciating detail in All This and the Ohio Turnpike, Too on February 27 (2012. Kinda figured you surmised that).
|Pretty much sums it up, though.|
I'll spare you all the ghastly details. In fact, I'd very much prefer blotting out the hideous Ohio Turnpike altogether. But, I was reminded of that trip when Jeff Bushman of The High Cost of This Low Living posted a very funny picture on Facebook recently.
While funny, the meme demonstrates that there may be some misconceptions about how chickens (lady chickens) actually lay eggs. I've no doubt Mr. Bushman knows. But, I really didn't. And I bet you anyone from Chicago doesn't know.
CUE NOSTALGIC WATERFALL EFFECTS....CUE A NISSAN MURANO ON I-80 IN PENNSYLVANIA....AND NOTHING ON THE RADIO...
BROTHER: "Hey, did you see that sign for MacGregor's Farmstand?"
ME: "Yeah, it said fresh eggs."
Okay, I think you can follow along. No sense writing 'BROTHER' and 'ME' anymore.
"No way I eat anything that a chicken craps."
"Chickens don't crap eggs."
"SURE they do."
"No, you idiot. They have vaginas."
"I don't know. Sounds sketchy to me. I'll take my chance getting eggs at the supermarket."
Well, just to prove I was right, I checked that most reputable of scholarly sources, the Internet. And that most reputable of the reputable, Wikipedia. This is what I found.
"Birds reproduce using their cloaca; this occurs during a cloacal kiss in most birds. Birds that mate using this method touch their cloacae together, in some species for only a few seconds, sufficient time for sperm to be transferred from the male to the female. The reproductive system must be re-engorged prior to the mating season of each species. Birds generally produce one batch of eggs per year [via the cloaca], but they will produce another if the first is taken away."
|"Show you my what!?"|
In other words:
Oh, it gets even better...
"Some species like ostriches, kiwi, swans, geese, cassowaries (whatever the frik those are), and ducks have phalluses. In those birds, the penis helps ensure water does not wash away the male sperm during copulation."
Why, those lucky ducks.
I just wonder how it looks that my search engine contains the keywords, "Chicken Vaginas."
|Just hadda look|
Birds from Down Under, like emus or ostriches.