Friday, January 22, 2016

Here It Comes

    As I write this, the weather report is full of doom, gloom, and dire warnings of the snowstorm rapidly approaching the East Coast. Children are at once thrilled at the prospect of frolicking in winter's magical white and hacked off that it's happening on a Saturday (meaning school will probably go on as scheduled Monday).   Grownups (and me) are peeved at the prospect of digging out from this annoyance.  But, after all, it IS January.  I suppose we should expect things like this.
Could be worse.
Consider the Donner Party in January, 1847.
Google it.  It's actually kinda sad.
    Except in Australia.  Times like this, I hate Australia.
"Up yours, mate.  G'day."
        The talking heads predict we'll get close to twelve inches.
    
"OMIGOD! OMIGOD! OMIGOD!  DID YOU HEAR THAT??"
NOTE:  Seriously,is anyone surprised by this?
This is what's known as a 'comedy softball.'

    Better go the store and get some milk, eggs, bread, batteries, water, soap, plywood, kitty litter, canned soup, plywood, wax-coated matches, cereal, tuna fish, scouring pads,penis-shaped pasta, kindling, dirty mags, orange juice, fishing line, duct tape, matches, carpet steamer, baby formula, gumballs, snowmelt, frozen meatballs, ice cream, and booze.
"And lube.  Don't forget the lube."
    Well, this blog shows every indication that it's going to get out of control.  

    I'd better head to the store before they run out of the good ice cream.
"All they've got at Giant is Rum Raisin!!
I'd better go to Shop Rite!!"

    Meanwhile, my dog is unimpressed....



    Stay warm and dry, my friends.

    Australia?  Yeah, you're time's coming.

"In the meantime, though...nice jugs there, Sheila."


32 comments:

  1. Never did get the whole store thing before a storm.

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  2. It is dumb everyone runs to the store. Even dumber here when a hurricane is approaching and everyone runs out to get milk. Hello! When the power goes out, your milk will spoil, stupid.

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    Replies
    1. But, liquor will be good to go.
      Hmmmmm....I'm detecting a trend.

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  3. Replies
    1. All we can do is laugh.
      And go buy booze.

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  4. Weather forecasts have a habit of not panning out, but i do hope nobody is injured if this storm turns out as severe as expected.

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    Replies
    1. I hope, after shoveling my driveway, I won't be writing to you from a hospital next week.

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  5. Southerners are infamous for their milk and bread in times like this. I got milk, I got bread, I have everything I need because I shop where I won't be empty on food/drinks if I get snowed in for a day.

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  6. I got the booze... but not much snow!

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  7. Soo funny how the stores go nuts. You'd think one day was the end of the world. I'm stocked up most times any way. Enjoy the booze while the pup licks his behind.

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  8. Oh dear God Al...you forgot the coffee!! I'll die without my coffee. I'd even walk in a blizzard for my coffee if I had to! Lol

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    Replies
    1. Coffee. We never run out. So, there's that.

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  9. I just don't get when people freak and buy all this crap at the store thinking they will not see the light of day for 5 months. Don't they know that if they get really snowed in and decide to ignore their Native American friends because they are stupid, they can just go next door and fry up old man Herman. I mean this is part of the survival kit-band aids, flashlight, matches, some breath mints and a how to cookbook written by Gaylord Donner. It's very helpful

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  10. Twelve inches isn't much.

    Love,
    Janie

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  11. The Aussies' time will never come, their winters are like Spring. The worst that happens to them is getting over-cooked in the Summer. If the snow gets to 12 inches, just remember that isn't very deep for an elephant.

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    Replies
    1. Sometime in July, I will post a picture of me around the pool. The title? "G'day, Down Under."

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  12. Hiya. South African here. Feel free to send some cold my way. We've basically been in a heat wave since end December.

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    1. You're like Australia, too! Without the kangaroos. Or dinosaur-like poison snakes. Wait. You probably DO have poisonous snakes. But, not kangaroos, right?
      Unless they're on holiday.

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  13. Nothing is as good as penis shaped pasta during a snow...wait WTF did you just say?


    Wishing you all the best drifts Al. It isn't going to snow here this year as I went out and bought an $800 snowblower in October.

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    1. I was really WONDERING who would catch that.
      Put them in boiling water and they get bigger.
      Wonder if I should give that a whirl?

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  14. Good luck. I sure hope power doesn't go out for my Dad (and you and everybody on the East Coast). I worry from afar. I bet you can still get a Girl Scout to deliver cookies....so you won't starve. Take care. Time to Netflix binge

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    1. You're right. It's the power that gets me concerned. Pretty gnarly (technical meteorological term) out here right now.

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  15. @Birgit-Gaylord's last words, when Mrs. Donner complained there was no food left: "Eat me."
    Probably wished he had that one back.

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  16. Don't think I have ever seen penis-shaped pasta just saying, also never seen a kangaroo at the beach also just saying, yeah it will get cold here in a few months but right here at my house it will not snow, if it did every man and his dog will here about it as it will be all over the news, just saying.

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    Replies
    1. Penis pasta's a big thing.
      Oops, let me rephrase that.

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  17. I love a good panic buy. It's like Black Friday all over again. We should do this every year and call it White Saturday or something where everyone just panic buys food. Good luck outlasting the weather. It seems to have calmed down already in some places. Though it got so bad in others I wouldn't be surprised if it's still a mess.

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    Replies
    1. We're done with it.
      In other words...oh my aching back.

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