As those of you who are regular tenants at Penwasser Place (incidentally, mental health screenings aren't terribly expensive) know, I spent the bulk of August
sitting around on my fat ass drinking beer editing my next book, It's An Adventure.
For those who care (once again, may I bring up mental health screening?), I completed the first edit of part two of the opus to myself. I'm now in the middle of my second. I more than likely will do a third edit in the hopes that, if I polish that turd enough times, it will wind up a diamond. New this time around will be page numbers (unlike It's Not Just a Job...wasn't that a pain in the crack?) and inclusion of photographs documenting my life aboard USS America. That is, if I can figure out how to send photos to the good folks at Create Space.
|Pictures like this!|
Anyway, because the millions I had counted on for dizzying sales of Shag Carpet Toilet and It's Not Just a Job never materialized (plus, since I sent a check for a couple grand to that nice Nigerian prince), I've had to find work. And, since "Sitting Around On My Fat Ass Drinking Beer" isn't a viable career path (as if), it had to be a real "big boy" job.
|Why, oh why???|
|"It's because they suck. |
I should know."
So, what have I been doing to raise a few dollars so that I can continue to crank out literary cow patties with no hope of a financial windfall?
I'm a janitor at a local high school.
But, the word "janitor," has negative connotations for some (not me). It's a lot like "garbageman," "pizza delivery boy," or "Speaker of the House."
|"That's 'Italian Food Transportation Representative.' |
In view of that little piece of political correctness, I am what they call a "custodian." Which, I suppose, sounds more dignified. Whatever. It's honest work for a decent wage. That cleans toilets. Which do not have shag carpet on them.
|It's a lot like this. |
Incidentally, muppets don't pop out
of that little plastic box on the wall.
It's for feminine hygiene products.
Which is pretty disturbing
since this is in the Boys Room.
To give me time during the day to
It's really not bad, although I have yet to adopt any kind of a regular sleeping/eating routine. On the other hand, I get to watch The View on a regular basis. Those ladies are beautiful (except Joy Behar. She's a bit of a beast), clever, and whacky. You go, Sister Whoopi!
It's tough working the "Graveyard Shift," though. I honestly don't know how vampires do it. Maybe it's all that blood.
|"It's because they suck. I should know."|
Congratulations on a "Penwasser Place Picture Two-Fer"!
Nobody wins anything, though.
Unless I get fired for using the pool at 3 am one morning.
On the bright side, it can get spooky in the middle of the night. For example, those CPR dummies in the First Aid classroom kinda creep me out.
Could really do without these.
Since I brought it up (look back a couple paragraphs), Happy Rosh Hashanah to my Jewish friends!
Personally, I think having a new year celebration (which did start at sunset last night, I'll grant you) on a frikkin' Monday seems like a rip-off to me. I mean, how much trouble can you get into at the beginning of the work week (Robyn, do tell)?
On the other hand, isn't Yom Kippur in a week or so? And, isn't that the Jewish Day of Atonement?
Maybe you'll have something to be sorry for, after all (Julie, do tell).
|"Just one more Mogen David |
and I'm putting on the 10 o'clock News."