Saturday, December 6, 2014

Brick Club USA

    NOTE:  This could easily be the last “original programming” for the rest of the year.  My plan is to post repeats (I can hear the complaints now) from now until Christmas.  Then, not even that much the last week of December.  The only new stuff will probably be a few Captain Captions since they’re easy to do.  Who knows?  Something may catch my eye which will inspire me to write.  Don’t hold your breath though.  For now...

    I’ve found myself involved in a new business undertaking.  Oh no, I’m not the boss.  Can you imagine me actually in charge of anything (those who worked for me in the Navy are probably wondering, “What does that crack mean?”)?

    I am working with someone of far more intelligence on a venture called “Brick Club USA.”  I’m, get this, the “creative engine.”  I know, huh?  Well, we’re on a budget.

    Anyway, Brick Club USA is an organization for those enthusiasts devoted to building blocks (you may know them as “Legos,” but I can’t write that because I don’t know how to insert the “Copyright” symbol.  So, you’ll just have to be content with “building block.”

    NOTE FROM SOMEONE PRETENDING TO NOT BE AL (IT COULD BE KEN LYNCH, BUT WHO AM I TO SAY?):  Hey...Al?  Here it is:  Legos®.  Geez, how simple is that?  No wonder you’re not in charge.

    NOTE TO EXPLAIN THE PREVIOUS NOTE:  If you don’t know by now, I’m prone to argue with myself.  I’m quite schizophrenic that way.

    Now, you may not like playing with building blocks, but I bet you know someone who does.  If you do, there’s good news to be had.  There will be regular contests with cash prizes (or beaver pelts, if that’s your thing).

    NOTE:  The offer of “beaver pelts” for entertainment use only.  Because the first rule of Brick Club USA is “Do not harm small animals.”  Okay, that’s the second rule.  The first is, “Never let Al be in charge.”
"Ya got that right, Buster."
    What am I asking?  Oh, that’s simple.  I would ask that you visit Brick Club USA’s website, for more information.

    Once there, you’ll find an array (NOTE: Fancy word for “a bunch”) of information concerning how you, a loved one, or a member of your family (NOTE:  yeah, I saw what I did there) can get involved.

    The rules for the contests are simple and are open to everyone (not just those in the United States, despite the name which was forced on us by the Republicans).  There is a small cost to enter ($10 USD), but First-Place winners can win $500!  Or beaver pelts.

    NOTE FROM SOMEONE PRETENDI...OH, YOU GET THE PICTURE:  What did we say about beavers??

Wrong Amazon
    Plus, there’s a feature which will allow you to shop for...uh...building blocks on Amazon.  And here’s the best don’t even have to get...uh...building blocks.  By clicking on the Amazon link, you can shop for anything and Brick Club USA gets credit.  Or beave...well, credit.  I’m not sure exactly how.  Remember, I’m not the boss.

Sigh...try again
That's better.
Hey, wait, don't they have to pay me for this plug?

    NOTE:  You can also avoid the holiday rush by clicking on that link to purchase your very own copy of Shag Carpet Toilet!  Or, if your bird cage is already lined, give it to someone you don’t like.  Win, win, win!!
WARNING:  Shameless plug ahead
Shag Carpet Toilet 
Sure to be ignored by millions this holiday season!
     Finally (sheesh, Al, aren’t you done!?), visit Brick Club USA’s Facebook site.  Go to Facebook (this, I would think, is self-explanatory) and type “Brick Club USA” in the ‘Search’ window (once again, self-explanatory).

    You’ll find more info there and we would really appreciate it if you would “Like” us (this, in a nutshell is how junior high school was for me).  I think this is a good thing.  Once more, not the brains of the outfit.

    So, let’s get the word out about Brick Club!  I know you all can do it.  I tell you, you tell a few, they tell a few more...

    Before you know it, we go viral.

    And you won’t need to get the CDC involved.

    Thank you.  Now continue on with the rest of your holiday season!


  1. I guess I'm going to LIKE Brick Club a lot! The mouth gag doesn't bother me, but you really need to eat something, Al! Congrats on your new position! Wishing you all the best!


  2. Sometimes, I wonder if we oldsters aren't bigger fans of building blocks than the kiddies are. I couldn't say how many times my hubby and I have continued to sit on the floor to finish a build after the grandkids have lost interest and wandered away. (They are nice enough to come back and help us back up, though.)

    1. That is almost word-for-word what my boss says. I think there's a lot to that.

  3. Considering your picture at the top of your blog, I'd have thought anything referring to a "Brick Club" would have to do with guys suffering from constipation.

    1. It would be a picture of me screaming, though.

  4. Beaver and brick club, are you sure you aren't back on toilet humor again?

    I have no bricks anymore or legos(sorry no r) hey maybe R can go great legos and solve all your issues? But 500 bucks would sure be nice anytime.

  5. Can I get an actual Amazon woman? That's my question.

  6. I think you can on eBay.
    Or Craig's List.

  7. Congratulations, Ken Lynch. You ARE a creative engine. Will you kindly make a "building block" in the shape of a penis tip for Bones? I can create the rest of it, and I want to give him something he really needs for the holidays.

    1. Ya know, it HAS occurred to me that Bones may, in fact, be a lady skeleton. Meaning, if I were to do that, I'd have to change his name to "Chaz."

  8. Consider myself a boner fide, sorry, bona fide member of Brick Club. Not much I can add to that, really. It all links together nicely.


    1. The boner jokes are flying. It's like junior high that way.

  9. As a past FLL Robotics Coach, we like and love the Brick Club!