Saturday, August 2, 2014

How Ya Fixed For Shag?

    As threatened promised, the printed version of Shag Carpet Toilet arrived in the mail last Thursday.  I would have told you then, but I wanted to give you a couple days to figure out what I was trying to say in Captain Caption.  Then, when you consider I have another post coming here Monday, there was precious little time to let you know about it.
"But...there's...no...pictures!!
No, wait.  That's a good thing."
    So, this is on delayed post, which means I'm speaking to you from the past.   Ooooooooooo.........

    Inspired by the overwhelming sale of two eBook versions of my opus to lavatorial embellishment, I decided to see if I could talk someone into actually printing the thing.  Luckily, things were slow at Create Space so-Voila! (French for "Huzzah!"  Maybe), the printed copy of Shag Carpet Toilet has arrived (which, had you read the first paragraph, you would have known.

  If you'd like to order it for yourself (or a village), please feel free (or reasonably priced) to use http://www.createspace.com/3769812 to get your copy (Good grief!  Can I use the frikkin' link enough times!?).  There's sure to be a mad rush to get this thing in your hot little hands.  Shag Carpet Toilet is a delightfully light (i.e., ridiculously simplistic) summer read.  

  Then, when you're done, you can take it with you into the bathroom.  What you do with it there is your own business.  FYI?    Paper cuts on a certain part of your anatomy can be quite painful.  Or, to use strict medical jargon, "stingy."

  It's more expensive than the eBook sure, but it's paper which has many other valuable uses.  For example, it's cheaper than a six-pack of Charmin'.
 
Shag Carpet Toilet
Yeah, yeah, Al, we get it
  By the way, if you were one of the two people who got the Kindle version, I changed nothing.  Well, Mickey gets a sex change and Spags gets an STD from a monkey, but that's about it.

"Kenneth Lynch"  
SURPRISE!!


24 comments:

  1. Congrats on the print version at your sea, how would you know papercuts there are stingy?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, there was this time I ran out of paper....oh, now, I've said too much.
      Okay, I'll say more. Newspaper print rubs off quite easily. Shouldn't have used the comics section, though. I think I had Hagar the Horrible on my ass.

      Delete
  2. Way to go Al-Ken! I had mine printed at smutz.com. I didn't do much research first so the cover looks like an orgy but I tell everyone it's just people playing Twister...naked.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Isn't that how Twister usually ends? Or it should.
      For anyone older than high school, that is.

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  3. If you could get this book in a school library I'd be so proud of you.

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    Replies
    1. I could just slip a copy onto one of the bookshelves. Next to the other classics like "David Copperfield,' 'Jane Eyre,' 'The Iliad,' or 'Best of Cracked.'

      Delete
  4. Congratulations!! I'll spread the news for you and see if I can con, wait I mean entice, a few people to buy it.

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  5. I hope the launching of your latest book is a tremendous success.

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    Replies
    1. Me, too. Gotta be better than that Kindle thing.

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  6. Replies
    1. Thanks! I hope my second one does well.

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  7. Kenneth? I got used to Ken and now you start with Kenneth? You are such a complex person, Penwusser.

    Love,
    Janie

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  8. I really should buy this book as it sounds like something I would like

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    Replies
    1. It's a short read. I think. Only a couple hundred pages. If you like it, time will fly. If you don't like it, you'll ask to be put out of your misery.

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  9. Congrats on your new print version, but something's missing. What happened to the actual shag carpet toilet? Did it go back to the 70's? Is it buried somewhere in the woods? It's still a great story that's definitely worth reading twice, but the toilet had sentimental value.

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When I tried to submit the shaggy toilet picture, it got all blurry and pixellated. So, I went with one of their cover designs. It actually works, because one of the chapters is about a fire in the woods.

      Delete
  10. Congrats are in order. Paper cuts on a certain part of my anatomy... Now you're telling me?

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, and just TRY getting a Band-Aid to stay on!

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  11. Well done making it to the wonderful world of print! Since I am a smug git who likes to think he is saving the environment, I will not be purchasing the printed copy. However, I am interested in the e-book version. I'm green like that.

    Being paper-free isn't that difficult, and it means I can ignore all those nasty court summons because they are printed on the Devil's Duplex.

    Anyway, congratulations and I hope your book sells well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think it's still available in the e-version. It must be.

      Delete
  12. Delighted for you, Al, that you have now made it as a "proper" writer. No doubt your book will find its way onto reading lists alongside Dickens and the Brontes.

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