Thursday, January 23, 2014

Captain Caption XXVII

Jake, from State Farm
(or for my French friends, Le Jake du State Farm)

"Seriously, dude?
It's 3 o'clock in the morning and
you want to talk about insurance?
Oh, me?
I want to get my freak on with a little phone sex.
For instance, I'm looking for chicks
who are into assless khakis."

30 comments:

  1. I suppose SOMEONE has to talk about insurance at 3 in the morning. The little chicki-doodles could have a part-time job when business is slow.

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    Replies
    1. Phone sex AND insurance. I could get into that.

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  2. There are people who work at night and would be up at 3AM, but not up during the actual morning. These people need insurance too.

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    Replies
    1. But how do they feel about assless khakis?

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  3. I make assless khakis looks even more assless

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  4. With my experience in trying to acquire auto insurance recently, I hope they put these people on 48-hour shifts and force them to listen to nonstop Disney songs for the entire 48 hours. And also, they're not allowed to sit down. Unsanitary, what with the assless khakis.

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    Replies
    1. Especially if you just ate Mexican food.

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  5. Technically, aren't all pants assless until you put somebody in them?

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    Replies
    1. Gee, I never thought of it that way. Dickless, too, probably. Unless you're a girl, of course. But, that's silly. A girl's pants would be dickless by definition.

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    2. Now you've given me an idea for the women's 3am uniforms. How about a dickie with those cut-out khakis!

      Julie

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  6. Insured phone sex! You die from hyper ventilation, you get a free car!

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    Replies
    1. Or blow up sheep. Customer choice, of course.

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  7. "No sir, you have AllState not Allstatefarm" probably a common conversation at 3am

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    Replies
    1. It does lend new meaning to the term "you're in good hands." With the...uh...phone sex, I mean.

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  8. You tell that bitch wife of yours I'm beautiful, not hideous... or I'm gonna cancel your policies!

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    Replies
    1. Put some makeup on him, a string of pearls, BAM!! Instant hottie.

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  9. I don't think it wise to have a paid up life insurance policy if you want to talk sex with someone in the middle of the night. It just might be enough to make your spouse reach for a meat cleaver.

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  10. I would laugh so hard if Willy Dunne Wooters wore assless khakis. He has the cutest little butt.

    Love,
    Janie

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  11. I love me some assless khakis and a hot red shirt! What a turn on! And, to be able to reach him in the middle of the night? Oh la la!!

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    Replies
    1. Coupla Red Bulls and some nachos...now you're talking.

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  12. I never could figure out why the dude was on the phone with the other dude at 3:00 AM. Something is seriously wrong there!

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  13. "Now get off the phone, because I'm expecting my usual call from the Progressive Insurance lady. She's into assless khakis and BDSM via skype, all for one low monthly service fee."

    xoRobyn

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  14. I kid you not. I'm actually typing this comment at three in the morning. Bloody time zones!

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    Replies
    1. No kidding. Plus, it 's like frikkin' summer in Australia.

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  15. I have a crush on the guys wife! It must be her sexy pajamas...

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