Monday, November 4, 2013

Sometimes There Can be TOO Much Christmas Cheer

This was on my Twitter feed Saturday and I'm very concerned.

Nov 2 at 9:43 PM
Santa Claus (@AmazingSanta)
11/2/13, 8:01 PM
I am COMING DOWN YOUR CHIMNEYS!! #Christmas #xmas, only 51 days, 23h 57m left!




Well, he'd better clean up.



Wonder if it would help if I was Jewish?

50 comments:

  1. at least he gave you an exact time, gives you time to get prepared. Call Mr. Clean and that paper towel guy

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  2. Well he's gotta put the fires out somehow. I wouldn't want him to jump down and get his ass set on fire because someone wasn't smart enough to not light a fire on the one day a year he visits.

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  3. I put up my Christmas tree yesterday morning :)

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    Replies
    1. When do you take it down? We normally put ours up on Thanksgiving weekend. Last year, because the house was a disaster because of the kitchen remodel, no tree or any decorations went up. This year, the Holiday Penwassers are back. But, everything is back in boxes no later than Dec 27th. I know. Bah-Humbug!

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  4. I'm waiting to see when Santa starts a Tumblr and starts posting gifs of his elves at work.

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    Replies
    1. Wearing leather push-ups and carrying whips.

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  5. He's tweeting now to? Better watch out, he could come down the chimney, snap a pic of you and tweet it to the world

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    Replies
    1. He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good, so be g....HEY! I think Santa works for the NSA!

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  6. Our fireplace is holographic but looks so real nobody can tell the difference. I wonder if Santa will appear as a holographic image. The damn gifts better be real!

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  7. Coming down chimneys (plural)? What's he going to do? Split his fat body in half and deposit the parts down each stack?

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  8. Blame it on the elves. As fast as those little rascals work with their constant little smirks, there's gotta be some uppers slipped in their egg nog.

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  9. Jesus Christ, Al, Chanukah is ONLY 23 days away! Stay Christian but start cooking latkes.

    xoRobyn

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    Replies
    1. I know. Chanukah is early this year and Thanksgiving is late.
      Oy, vey!

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  10. I'm surprised nobody in the history of the world has heard Santa coming down the chimney, freaked out and attacked him because he's a home invader technically, strange that!

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    Replies
    1. They give him a pass because he's bringing loot. And doesn't eat all the cookies.

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  11. Do you have more than one chimney or was he just making an educated guess? If I were you I'd plug every one of them. You know how to make a chimney plug, right?

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    Replies
    1. Shove lots of cheese in it? Oh...wait. That's how to make a plug in ME.

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  12. Just screw a metal plate over your chimney so he can't come down the inside, and leave him a box of tissues. If he don't like that, well, that's what Rudolph's for.

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  13. Replies
    1. I guess as long as fat ass (who could also be confused with Chris Christie) brings me a flat screen TV, I guess I'm cool with it.

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  14. We never had a chimney! He must have hated us and thought we were prudes...

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    Replies
    1. I never thought of that. Maybe the keyholes?

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  15. Well my company's Christmas party is next Saturday so sort of related I guess?

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    Replies
    1. Holy smokes, that's even before Veterans Day! Which I think Canada has, although you call it something else...?
      At least you already had your Thanksgiving.
      Still...

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  16. Either Petsmart or Petco started their Santa commercials three weeks before Halloween. WTH?

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    Replies
    1. And there is a HUGE Christmas display at Home Depot.
      And I saw a Christmas commercial from IHOP this morning.
      I'd like to just get past Veterans Day.

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  17. I was here, thought I had commented.....I know what you mean about not decorating last season. My downstairs bath is being torn up too. A young kid who helps me with chores, asked if I wanted a tree this year. At first I said yes, but seeing this mess, I told him, "Forget it." I notice a lot of my neighors have their outdoor lights up already. Maybe I'll string some lights on the outdoor evergreens and see how much electricity I can use up. LOL

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    Replies
    1. Mrs. Penwasser and I had this discussion about outdoor Christmas lights this past weekend.
      Me: "Are you kidding me? People have their Christmas lights already up!"
      Mrs. P: "Maybe they just had them up all year."
      Me: "But, these are LIT!"
      Mrs. P: "You know, there are Halloween lights you can put up."
      Me: "But those are orange and white."
      Mrs. P: "Why not orange, white, and black?"
      Me: "Think about what you just said...black lights?"
      Mrs. P: "Oh."
      Me: "Anyway, I like Halloween displays. Those are cool. In fact, I think there's one of those just down the street. I'm talking about red, green, and blue lights. On a tree! Before Veterans Day!"
      Mrs. P: "Well, still, don't be such a sour puss. If people want to put lights up, let 'em."
      Me: "I just don't think it's right, that's all."
      Mrs. P: "Well, you're an old crab."
      Me: "Look! That's what I was talking about!!"
      [pointing at the Halloween display of which I spoke]
      Mrs. P [not looking]: "Congratulations! You win."
      Me: "No, it's a Halloween display."
      Mrs. P: "Oh, that IS neat. But you're still an old crab."

      Wait until we start fighting about how warm the house should be.

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    2. Maybe I should make this a post...?

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    3. Yes, conversations with Mrs. Penwasser around the fireplace is a wonderful idea! Unless of course Mrs. Penwasser turns out to be you in a dress, and a wig. Now that might really stir up Santa.

      Julie

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  18. But I have wood burning in my fireplace!

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  19. Ugh. Go away, Santa. I am not ready, don't know if I will be this year. I feel like phoning it in.

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    Replies
    1. That's actually pretty much what we did last year. With the exception of the snowman in the front yard, you wouldn't have even known it was Christmas at our house.

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  20. Thanks for the warning, Al. - I'll start bricking up my fireplace immediately.

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    Replies
    1. But then he might come in your front door. And Christmas carolers don't need to see that.

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  21. Your expression in that picture... I'm still laughing! ;)

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    Replies
    1. I was very scared.
      Especially since there was a mirror in front of me.

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  22. Psst, gave your blog a mention today. It'll be my fault if Martha Stewart leaves a comment.

    xoRobyn

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  23. What?!? When the fuck did Christmas get here?? IM STILL EATING HALLOWEEN CANDY!!!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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    Replies
    1. And you will continue to do so until you have Christmas candy until you have St. Valentines candy until you have Easter candy until you're drinking beer at Memorial Day barbecues.
      It's the Circle of Life.
      Or Type II Diabetes.
      Something like that.

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