Did you ever stop to think that what you say can sometimes last forever?
Even though you may have no earthly recollection what it was (hell, you probably have no earthly recollection that you need to put on pants, you old bastard) you may be reminded one day when an adult walks into the rest home and says, “Hey, remember me? I was the one with a face that could stop time.”
And then he unplugs the ventilator.
Obviously, some things hurt. Even though you made a comment in jest, the recipient of your oh-so-clever jibe may not have thought it was terribly funny.
|Surprisingly, I was teased unmercifully.|
What? They made fun of my carnation.
What did you think I meant?
I’m sure, if I asked, all of you could give me such an example.
Luckily, there are also times when something someone said was a good thing. Whether a sincere congratulations or approving word, I recall them as if they happened yesterday.
There are even those sayings which I’ve unknowingly adopted as my own.
Such it is from something said to me more than forty years ago.
When I was twelve, I was a stockboy, delivery boy, salesboy (apparently, the requirement of the job was to be a ‘boy.’) at the Thompson Food Market in Stratford, Connecticut.
SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION: The chapter “Gold As Gold,” from my mega-thriller (in my mind at least) Shag Carpet Toilet, is based on these experiences.
|GET YOURS NOW! |
DON'T BE ONE OF THE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS WHO DON''T HAVE A COPY!!
|Seriously, this is what Gladys looked like. |
Although not as attractive.
And a woman.
Together, they were made for each other.
If only because no one would have been
able to live with them. However, I
learned many things while working for them. Gladys taught me how to make the cover of Land O’ Lakes
butter into something you wouldn't want your mother to see. Max taught me that pimento loaf is just
as tasty as boiled ham, if not cheaper.
|Banned by the Catholic League of Decency. |
Along with Rosemary's Baby, hippies,
and Richard Nixon.
His speech was peppered with little sayings, most of which were directed at the former dancer crafting pornography from butter cartons.
However, he always had a kind word for his customers, especially children. No matter how small our purchase, he made us feel that we were buying an entire side of brontosaurus, when in reality we were just getting penny candy.
Even though he’s long since passed, I still remember him. Even more, I hear the same words which came out of Max’s mouth whenever we handed over some of our allowance for a couple pieces of Bazooka Bubble Gum.
It’s the same thing I say whenever a student with whom I’m working has helped me out with something: “Thank you, sir, you’re a real gentleman.”
So be mindful of what you say to others, especially children. Kids quite often repeat things they heard from decades before, good or bad.
Or they could give the Land O’ Lakes lady boobs.
And no one needs that.
|Oh, yeah. |
Gladys would so get arrested nowadays.