Thursday, July 11, 2013

Facebook Funnies LII

That awkward moment when the subject of erectile dysfunction comes up.  
Or Syria.


Note:  Well, it's been a year (yeah, no kidding) so this will be the final Facebook Funnies.  Or at least this 
will be the final time I post a picture and caption under the title of Facebook Funnies.  The reason I chose
 the title is that I picked certain pictures that I had already posted on Facebook and reposted them here.  Which were...funny.  Sometimes I changed the words a little.  Most times I didn't.  What's more, if we were friends on Facebook, you had already seen these, so it was kind of a gyp.  I say 'kinda,' because there's usually a significant time lag.  For instance, I'm writing this on June 20th. 
Anyway, I'll continue to do this, but using a different title.  If you have any suggestions, please let
me know and I'll say it was my idea maybe I'll use it.
By the way, today is my birthday.  Since I have a quirky sense of humor, I chose today for my annual physical with the doctor.  And you know what that means.  If you don't...think Turkish prison. 

  

"Says here I've been in seven Facebook Funnies.  Huh, ain't that some shit?  
I think it's time the IRS pays that little smart ass Penwasser a visit."




47 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Jiggle, jiggle, poke, prod, thump, thump, deep breaths, breath normal, lay down, follow my finger, shorts to your thighs, cough for me, draw your knees up, and relax. Relax.
      Damn straight indeed.

      Delete
  2. The IRS would be some birthday gift. They'd be up your ass all day, instead of just for one appt.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So THAT'S what causing all that noise.

      Delete
  3. Happy Birthday Mr P - or was it yesterday ?... hard for me to know with you guys on the back end of the planet! hehehehe. Anyways, many many happy returns.

    cheers

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think it was yesterday to you. Good God, these things are weird. For instance, RIGHT NOW it's 11:24 AM on July 11. Whereas, isn't it July 12th where you are?
      But, at least you're not my neighbor. Where he is it's 6:15 PM on March 23.
      I think he smokes pot, though.

      Delete
    2. For me it's always Oct 19th, because everyday should be my birthday. But then I guess it would be EVERYONE'S birthday and well, we just can't have THAT. Never mind.

      Happy Birthday Al, enjoy your day!

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. Thanks! To celebrate, I might get a Metamucil Frosty at Wendys and get to bed by nine.

      Delete
  5. Hope you have a wonderful birthday! Blow that candle out your ass!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. After my exam, I'm unable to force it down to get a good gust of air.

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. Thank you. I'm clean as a whistle inside and out.

      Delete
  7. Admit it, you just are having are a hard time with the Roman Numerals getting up that high and want to get back to I..haha happy birthday, at least you get to show someone your birthday suit.

    Captain Caption?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Captain Caption....hmmm...that may work.
      So today I'm 55 which means I'm like the speed limit.
      Everyone will ignore me.

      Delete
  8. Happy birthday Al, and unfortunately I can't think of a new name for the Facebook Funnies. I do think as well that Edward Snowden, and how the Russkies accepted him (even if it was just for a few hours) would probably cause that reaction from the two of them. Now I can look forward to the FBI knocking my door down because I mentioned Snowden. Wheeeeeee.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Since yours is the second comment, I've read, I still don't have an idea for another name.
      You may not want to answer the door if someone knocks.

      Delete
  9. Thirty-nine again, Mr. Benny? Have a great time on your special day. Try not to enjoy that physical too much.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My brother advised me to think of the word 'cashews' when the doctor was in up to his elbow (no, I don't know the significance of 'cashews'). I did, but then I started to chuckle. I wonder what the doctor thought of that.

      Delete
  10. Happy birthday!!!!!!

    I hope the doctors appointment went well.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He was in and out in less than five seconds.
      Which seemed like five hours.
      DISCLAIMER: I realize that complaining about this to a woman is meaningless, but still.....

      Delete
  11. Happy Birthday!

    That top picture is way too funny!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes these things write themselves. Like next week's entry which will be called....why, let's leave that a surprise!
      That's not what it's called. I think you knew that.

      Delete
  12. Happy birthday, Al.

    I hope the physician deployed plenty of lubricant!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He actually did. He had to wrap a rope around his waist so he wouldn't fall in.

      Delete
  13. Al I wish you could have heard how much I laughed at the final bit, like an out loud proper verbal, prolonged laugh. It was going through my head that Obama was in Facebook funnies all the time as I read the first one and that just hit me so so hard hahaha. Happy birthday though buddy, this is a good way for FF to go out, hope you have a great one mate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If I get the time, I'll try to come up with who's in second place. Putin, Biden, Ahmadinejad....?

      Delete
  14. Happy Birthday Al! I just heard about a patient who drew smiley faces on his butt before he went in for a colonoscopy. Needless to say, I thought of you, and know that you must have had something fun in store for your doctor today. Hope your exam went well, and enjoy the rest of your day!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you haven't read the story of my colonoscopy, let me know and I'll send you a copy. While I didn't draw a smiley face on me bum (there's always next time), I did talk about cave paintings and Jimmy Hoffa.

      Delete
  15. Happy Birthday! Great funnies! Definitely keep'em coming regardless of title.
    Tina @ Life is Good

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope you like the next one on July 18th. It's under a different name, but the sentiment's the same.

      Delete
  16. Hysterical! You made me laugh so much! and you are a youngster! Just think how much funnier you will be in ten years! happy b'day! keep the funnies coming (so to speak)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My kids think I'll be a scream at the home.

      Delete
  17. I guess Putin does all that Judo to make him forget all about it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought you used judo to make bagels?
      Learn something new everyday.

      Delete
  18. Happy Birthday! But seriously the president can read? Do you think he owns a Paula Deen cook book or is the on the book burn list?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He's a product of American schooling.
      So...no.

      Delete
  19. "turn your head to the side and cough."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I miss the days when that was the most uncomfortable part of it...

      Delete
  20. Mr. Penwasser,

    A somewhat belated happy birthday. And considering I'm in a different time zone ahead of your good self, I have really no excuse for this outrageous oversight.

    Next time David Cameron is over there, get your dudes to arrest him. That is all, thank you and enjoy your weekend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We'll get our Feds to round him up. They're super efficient and...hmm...well, you'll probably end up getting him back.

      Delete
  21. Happy, happy birthday, Al! (A little belated, sorry.) I hope your man-parts stood, um, up to the test and that your doc was highly impressed.

    Love ya,
    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was all going smoothly until I farted during the prostate check. Poor man went right through the sheetrock.

      Delete
  22. Happy Birthday Al!! I love that picture. I want to put it on my FB and ask the commenters to write their own caption lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It IS a perfect picture which screams for a caption, huh? If you do, I'd like to see what people can come up with.

      Delete
  23. 'Presidential giants ponder fart tax"

    Oh, and Happy Birthday from Down Under!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knew the government wanted to take it out of my ass!

      Delete