Saturday, August 25, 2012

I'm Just Wondrin'

NOTE:  The following is a repost (nice word for "rerun").  Since I'm in Southwest Virginia helping my son move into his apartment for his third year of college, I didn't have time to write anything new (NOTE IN A NOTE:  Have I mentioned that 'Delayed Posting' rocks?).  But, luckily, from the looks of the comments, none of you have read this (even Sherilin).  So, it may have sucked back then.  Which means...it may suck now.  In any case, though, it's new to you.  Meaning...I could have avoided telling you that it was a rerun.  And you would have continued to think I was a wicked prodigious writer.  Oh...crap.
Enjoy. 

Unleaded.  Arm and a Leg.  Are You Frikkin' Kidding Me?

When the self-serve feature on the gas pump asks you to "Remove Card Quickly"....

How "quickly" is "quickly"?  Will it work if you tease the gas pump and remove it "slowly"?  Is there such a thing as too "quickly"?  Can you shove the card back in for a brief second and then pull it out "quickly"?

I pretty much think all of the above is a metaphor for my sex life.  No WONDER the attendant gives me the evil eye each time I drive up.

I'm just sayin'...

Since you made it this far, I feel compelled to share a few pictures with you.  These have been hanging around my computer's Desktop for quite some time.  I'm not sure why I downloaded them.  Maybe for the A-Z Challenge...?  Anyway, here they are.  Maybe you can figure out why they're here.

This picture of Hugh Jackman-can I call you Wolverine?-was downloaded as a sop to my female followers.  I felt I owed them some "eye candy."  But, I think I posted a picture of Shemar Moore, instead.  For that, you're welcome.

I'm really not sure why I downloaded this, either.  Although, with a name like The Thing, I bet the post was going to be of a sexual nature.



I know why I had this.  Remember my post on Yoga for the A-Z Challenge?  Sure you do (lying's acceptable).  I just ran out of room to describe old Olympics sports, like Tug-of-War.  I just thought that pigeon shooting thing was funnier.

I also know why I downloaded this.  I was going to write a post about places like Sheetz, those food marts/gas stations which you see along our nation's highways.  Along with road kill, pieces of tires, and motorists pretending to look at their tire while they're urinating.

Ditto Wawa.  Both Wawa and Sheetz are a lot like 7-Eleven.  Although cleaner, they all sell mummified hot dogs.


Peeps.  Multi-colored Peeps.  Which rot your teeth.


Yoo-hoo.  My original entry for 'Y' in the A-Z Challenge.  Until it was supplanted by Yoga.

??????????????????
I may have been drinking.




Okay, gotta run.  I need to find out where all that banjo music is coming from.  Then, maybe I'll go get a hot dog from Sheetz.

35 comments:

  1. I don't think I've ever read this before Al so I'm happy enough, I love the Thing haha, he's definitely one of my favourite superheroes, no idea why he's on your desktop though, great concept for a post though Al, good luck with the move too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love my Thing, too. Sometimes a couple times a day because...ohhhh, that wasn't what you said, is it? Ooops, never mind.

      Delete
  2. Al Never saw this in my life before (Slow meaningful wink (What ever you do don't get the "I" mixed up with an "a"....)and a nudge) although in truth since I live my life as a goldfish - once around the bowl and I've forgotten pretty much everything..... I suspect I would not remember - in fact I've probably posted this very same comment before....

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    Replies
    1. I'd hate to spend my life as a goldfish. Imagine how it would be if your poops kept floating right in front of your eyes if your owner wasn't too diligent in cleaning out the bowl?

      Delete
  3. I hope you're having a great time moving in your son. We move our son in last weekend for his second year of college (dorm though - not apartment). I too had not read this post, but I appreciate the integrity you showed by telling us it was a repost! Love your stuff!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Moving my son in wasn't all that bad. He has an apartment that he'll be sharing with a friend of his. It should be fun for them. But, I had to laugh when I looked at their (small) balcony. There was a placard which read "Maximum Capacity: 10 People." I commented, "Nooooo, they don't rent to college kids."
      $368 at the Kroger, though.
      Yikes!
      Mrs. Penwasser and I will be having cat food.
      Except the dog.
      He'll be having dog food.

      Delete
  4. i didn't read it before. maybe i was shunning you when it was posted originally. or maybe i was just on vacation. or had pneumonia. the possibilities are endless.
    i always wonder how quickly is too quickly too. and why it can't be slowly.
    wolverine doesn't do it for me. i'm not big on clawed mancreatures. though he does have nice shoulders.
    peeps are best used as fillers in smores. they hold everything together nicely, give it some color and you get the fun of roasting a bunny.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. also, try not to catch anything in fire while you're with your son this weekend. i know there are issues when you hang out with your male relatives. no candles allowed, no matter how smelly his apartment might be.

      Delete
    2. Our Campground Fire story has now been placed into Family Lore.
      Right behind not making it to the bathroom on the way home from our sister's house.
      Good times, good times.

      Delete
    3. By the way, that smores angle sounds fantastic!!!!! Next Easter I should get a few which I can freeze and use at Camping Trip 2013 (provided the campground lets us back).

      Delete
  5. Nope never saw this one, lol I wondered that too about the remove card quickly, I'm sure the thing was on a sexual nature and avoid the banjos, run away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, no, only south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Which is...where...I...was...this...weekend. Uh, oh. Glad I made it back.

      Delete
  6. My favorite station is QuikTrip. They have 49cent drinks and other specials all the time. When they first came into my area about 2 years ago, they had a price war with two nearby gas stations. So when gas was like 3.30, they were getting as low as 2.70. It was good times.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do like Sheetz and Wawa. Although they don't sell Nudie Mags.
      I may have looked.

      Delete
  7. I have often wondered about the "remove quickly" remark on the gas pump myself. But I would never connect those words to my sex life. NEVER! ;) Glad I never met you! Hahahahaha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. People wonder why I start giggling when I pump gas ("pump gas"....that sounds dirty. Now I'm giggling again).

      Delete
  8. Hmmm.....Now I'm feeling sorry for Mrs. Al!

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  9. You can remove it too quickly. It then requires a cancel of the entire thing, a re-insertion, and the proper withdrawal time lapse. All while I get incredibly annoyed.

    *This can be applied to the gas station or my sex life as well. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm gonna try that.
      At the gas station.
      No sense messing with bedroom gymnastics.

      Delete
  10. Will it work if you just stick the tip of the card in there? or does it start wiggling?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It may. But, it won't be gas that will come out.

      Delete
  11. It's all new to me. This post just shows what I was missing before I became one of your minions.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When I re-post something, I really make sure to check who has commented. I don't want to make you suffer through something you've already seen. Better you should do so with new stuff....wait. That didn't sound right.

      Delete
  12. Wow, I don't believe I've ever seen a Sheetz before. Alas.
    Some Dark Romantic

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's an East Coast thing which caters to the bib overall and questionable dental hygiene crowd.
      Who am I kidding? I visited a few of them this weekend and I floss. I even got gas there (and I don't mean from their burritos).

      Delete
    2. Is is a southern East Coast thing? I'm in the NY metro area and don't see those around here. I also don't travel much by car, maybe they're right around us in NJ or PA and I just haven't lived...thinking on it, that last bit's perfectly right. :-)
      Some Dark Romantic

      Delete
  13. If I had read it before I wouldnt have had a clue what "Peeps" were but now I have been educated.
    I even like them :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even though the sugar which is in them grinds in my teeth when I eat them (translation: Oh, this can't POSSIBLY be good for me), I love them.

      Delete
  14. I know why you downloaded those pics. You just wanted to prove to people you knew how. Because people our age always get teased about not knowing how to use the computer. "MOM! Just hit ALT CNT DELETE-DUH!!" I just found the memory card slot on my lap top just a few days ago. I've the lap top for 5 or 6 years now.

    Peeps rock! I even have a little stuffed animal peep. In pink. It does clash with the cottage theme in the livingroom though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Funny you should say that. My kids are amazed at the things I can do with the computer. When my son saw that I knew how to make an iMovie, he was amazed. Then, I asked him to set up the clock on the microwave.
      Baby steps, baby steps.

      Delete
  15. "Do not penetrate credit card into pump slot more than once, you will get it too excited which may cause a premature leakage"

    ReplyDelete
  16. Does anyone else think that the rock thing looks like poop? Is it just me? Am I gross?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hugh Jackman....MMMM, yea he's a hawtie!

    ReplyDelete
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