Friday, May 18, 2012

WARNING! Shameless Self-Promotion Ahead

     Thanks to my good friend Eva, at Wrestling With Retirement (feel free to thank her), I've learned how to inflict my book, Shag Carpet Toilet, on yet another ebook outlet.   This means that, in addition to Kindle, sales can lag on another source:  Nook from Barnes and Nobles.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shag carpet, toilet, dogs named Duke, dead turtles, Chief Wild Eagle.
We frikkin' get it, Al.  Now, write something new!

  You may know them as the nationwide bookstore which didn't tube.  But, when you stop to consider that they've allowed me to place my book with them, can they be far behind Walden, Borders, and Mr. Bookworm's Sock Puppet Emporium?  Hey, as long as I can sell a few of my books before they go the way of K-Mart (oops, spoke too soon.  But, really, it's only a matter of time.  At least that's what the Mayans said), I'm good. 
"Attention, K-Mart shoppers.  Our blue light special today is on mens underwear. The prices are slashed and so is the underwear. Thank you for shopping K-Mart."
Oh, yeah, and Sofia Vergara shops there. Sure, she does.

    There's lots worse things that can happen than spending $2.99 on an e-copy of Shag Carpet Toilet.

  I could post more pictures of me in my underwear.

  Or, I can make you watch this dumbass commercial on a never-ending loop.  I'd rather shop at K-Mart

  By the way, hate mail can be sent to Eva at Wrestling With Retirement


  1. Good luck with all the sales!

  2. Hey, I liked that commercial! I wouldn't eat the burger, but I'd bite the waitress if she asked me nicely.

  3. Well congrats on getting on Nook. I know someone with a Nook, so there is at least a chance you can sell a copy there.

  4. Al, now I have a credit card I seriously want to buy this and soon haha. If I don't own a Kindle or anything like that, basically, if I own nothing for reading books but a computer and my own hands, can I still buy it and read it?

  5. I bought my wife a Kindle for Christmas. I'll make her read it. You happy now! Sheesh.

  6. I tried looking it up on Kindle the other day and couldn't find it. I'll try again!

  7. Ah, the problem is you're published under a different name . . .

  8. Ah K-Mart say it isn't so (that's it for department store shopping on my island). Seems you're funny all over the place. BUT, I should not have gone back and read older posts - I may be scared for life - or at least the next few days.

  9. They closed down my local Kmart over ten years ago

    good luck on your book though

  10. That's the thanks I get for helping you out? You have your hate mail sent to me???

    Seriously, Good luck with sales, and I have the link for downloading the Kindle app on my post Friday, May 19th.

  11. @Ruth: Thanks. I really SHOULD finish something new, though.
    @Gorilla: That chick makes my skin scrawl (and crawling skin really freaks out the kids).
    @Mark: Here a Nook, there a Nook, everywhere a Nook, Nook. Sure a lot of Nookie flying around.
    @Bushman: From what I understand, there's a lot of free stuff out there for Kindles. Not to mention you can check out library ebooks.
    @Sheila: The different name is so I can stay one step ahead of the guys from the home.
    @farawayeyes: Yeah, that underwear shot should come with a warning.
    @Dana: Thanks!
    @Adam: Did they at least replace it with a Walmart?
    @Eva: I gotta go take a look at that. Thanks!

  12. Yay! Keep getting that shag carpet everywhere. Here's hoping many more people discover its (and your) greatness.


  13. That was the most terrible ad I've ever watched in my life. The poor girl was having a seizure and those jerks only cared about their burgers. More pictures of you in underwear, please.

  14. Great poolside, beach, bathtub, and any other imaginable summer reading possibilities for Shag Carpet Toilet! Congrats Al! Julie

  15. @Robyn: Aw, shucks, ma'am.
    @Nellie: I loathe that commercial. If a chick like that ever came up to my table, I know for sure what I would order: lunch at Denny's.
    @Julie: Just check your brain at the door and feel good about yourself. Because you know you would never put shag on a toilet.

  16. Good luck with your book! It has a cool title.

  17. Congrats on another conquered ebook outlet! Your book sounds like a lot of fun.:)

  18. I didn't know it was on Kindle. I just went and bought it there! I hope you sell many of them!

  19. @Jessica: Thanks! I wish I could say that shag carpet on a toilet was pure fiction. But, sadly, that part of the book is based solely on fact.
    @nutschell: It was fun writing it, for sure.
    @Pat: Thanks, I appreciate it.

  20. Well,that's it. I'm off to by "Toilet" for my Kindle. I can hold myself back no more. I needz the "Toilet."