|1986-Top Gun comes out. |
Chicks really don't dig me.
|Hey, look! I think Dunkin Donuts is open!|
1986- Since my old job fixing airplanes, teaching aircraft maintenance, and eating doughnuts was overmanned, I was forced to change to Aviation Antisubmarine Warfare Operator. I flew landbased P-3s to search for (and sometimes find!) Soviet (yep, we were still giving each other the finger in the 80s) submarines. We ate doughnuts inflight! Oh, yeah, and finding subs was cool, too.
What's more, the Navy gave me $14,000 as an incentive to do so.
More doughnuts for everyone!
|Don't you wish you had a bitchin' denim jacket like me? |
I thought so.
Hair Gone Wild-1989 Edition
Coincidence? Well, let's put it this way. Bitches were scared after we mooned one of their subs.
|NOTE: My hat was one size too small. |
This was why I looked like I was just goosed.
Before the top of my head went numb.
(NOTE: Oh, did I mention? I was on a deployment to Sicily at the time. Mrs. Penwasser suffered from the same lack of judgement the Navy had. She was still married to me).
1992- My son is born. Fortunately, he looks nothing like me (don't worry-I have homefield advantage).
1994- My daughter is born. Well, whaddya know? It works!
|"You're an officer now. |
You can afford a hat that fits."
1996- Make my first trip to the Persian Gulf which the Navy says we should call the Arabian Gulf, because Persia is what Iran was called before it was called Iran and after it was called Iran. Confused? I'll bet. But, we don't like them and it was our way of saying, "Hey, Muammar! FU!" Hey, I don't care. It gave me a chance to tie my shoe on the flight deck as we traveled through the Suez Canal (NOTE: This canal didn't have gondolas. But, it did have a lot of people washing their clothes next to chickens).
|"Wonder if anyone will notice |
if I just give him a boot in the ass?"
1998- I leave the ship right as I learn to hold my pinkie the right way while drinking coffee. And to not say "F*****g A!" when asked if I'd like more rolls.
1998- I become the Officer in Charge of a communications unit in Willow Grove Pennsylvania. Mainly because nobody else wanted the job.
|They let us carry guns!! |
I've never liked the way I'm holding my right wrist, though.
Looks a little 'fem' to me.
Okay, I know, I promised that I'd finish this hideous ego piece today. But, there's still the final chapter of my Navy career to write. And it's just about time to eat. So, until next time....